They met over the fence and have worked together as contract milkers ever since. Though Abbi’s not from a farming background she’s taken to it like a natural.
“I love the fact that I get to work outdoors and that no two days are the same. Being a farmer is a bit like being a vet, a builder, a scientist, an electrician and a plumber rolled in one. You get to do all the jobs that make up farming. That’s very satisfying.”
But, like any job, sometimes you can have too much of a good thing. A few years ago lack of downtime really took a toll on her wellbeing and she’s keen to avoid a repeat.
“I was working very long hours, often with no breakfast and sometimes no lunch.
“But it was my first job and I didn’t know any different. I almost didn’t carry on in the industry. Once you get tired like that, it’s a downward cycle. You start eating shitty food and then you start feeling shitty. I’m much more aware now about looking after myself and our staff too.”
The first six months of the dairy season are always particularly busy as Abbi combines helping run the business with on-farm relief work, AI technician duties and calving.
Getting time off to recharge the batteries isn’t easy. The answer is to work smarter.
“In farming you’ve got external stuff like the weather and payout prices – things you can’t change at all. But there are other things about your operation, like staff and rosters, that you can change to make sure you and others get time off.
“We’re just in the process of altering our roster now so that everyone has more regular time off and they’re not working too long hours but we still all know what’s happening at work as well.”
A unique challenge of farming is that people often live where they work. That makes escaping work worries doubly difficult.
“Farming can definitely put you under a lot of stress as a couple. We work together and live in the same house and we’re always talking about things that we’re going to do or need to do on the farm whether it’s at breakfast, lunch or dinner,” she says.
“Two or three years ago we realised that we couldn’t actually have a proper break unless we go overseas or somewhere with zero cellphone reception. So now that’s what we do.”
The couple also schedule regular breaks for local activities.
“My husband plays golf at least once a week and I do a lot for the Dairy Women’s Network. I’m a regional leader and help to organise events around the area which keep people connected.”
Abbi says the network has played a big role in helping her feel on top of things.
“Having that sort of support is just the biggest thing. I get to see a group of women on their one night off farm and we don’t talk about cows and grass. Being in a room full of women like that is special. It’s a great boost.”
Abbi says women’s on-farm contributions can sometimes be undervalued and women should work on their confidence and leadership skills to compensate. A turning point in her own thinking came a few years ago when she saw a Farmstrong video on farming women’s wellbeing.
“This video showed the pressures that rural women face and how they deal with things. Every woman in the room could identify with that. It really showed that as a woman in farming you need to look after yourself and make your wellbeing a priority.
“I also did an Agri Women’s development course, It’s All About You, which really helped me. Once you learn to value yourself you can do a much better job of passing that message on to everyone else. Sometimes you’ve just got to put your own needs first and ask yourself what’s one thing that you do each week that’s just for you. Just one thing. Mine is that sometimes I go for a massage and devote that time to myself.”
Abbi has also explored other strategies for coping with busy times.
“Over calving time this year I actually sat down and made a meal plan for the whole of calving, which is something I picked up from another lady attending an event. It definitely made cooking meals a lot easier during calving. We got a lot less takeaways this calving. If you eat well, you have more energy.”
As Abbi’s administration role has expanded, keeping active has also become a priority.
“What I found over the last couple of years is that being less active on the farm I really needed to do some exercise. So we play touch rugby in the spring and we’ve started going for a walk once a week up a hill somewhere just to keep in shape. I also enjoy horse riding. Sometimes it’s a little thing like walking to the cow shed instead of driving.”
Abbi says maintaining a positive frame of mind also helps when the going gets tough.
“You can’t just focus on the problems in farming, you’ve got to stay positive and decide how you’re going to deal with challenges and keep moving forward. There’s no point dwelling on things that have happened. That’s a real trap.”
The biggest lesson Abbi has learnt is not to carry the load alone.
“A couple of years ago, towards the end of calving, I was at one of our dairy women’s dinners and the woman running it asked people to put their hand up if they’d had to deal with coccidiosis, rotovirus or crypto (cryptosporidium) and pretty much everyone’s hands went up. There was this giant sigh of relief in the room because no one felt alone any more dealing with it.”
Mini-breaks going to the local store also help break up her week.
“In the past we’ve worked in some very isolated places but we’re lucky now. We’re only 10 minutes from Culverden so we often just head to the Farm Source store to have a break and grab a coffee and chat with other people coming in for farm supplies. There’s also a monthly barbecue they run so there are definitely things you can join in if you want to.
“I’ve learnt that every season is different and every season has its challenges.
“The trouble is when you’re working in a situation where you’re isolated it can often feel like the world’s falling apart. That’s probably the time you feel least like going out and reaching out to others but that’s the time when you need support the most. If you’re feeling under the pump, share the load and remember you are not alone. Get out and talk to somebody, whether it’s a dinner group or a byo fish and chip night with neighbours and friends.”
